Transcript
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And we're back with another episode of Life-Changing Challengers.
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Again, I'm your host, rad Minus, if you didn't already know that, I'm extremely lucky and privileged to have Dan Story on the show today.
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How are you doing, dan?
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I'm doing well.
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Thanks, brad.
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It's a good day here in Prague.
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It's been a good day with the family, but excited to be having a conversation with you today.
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Oh, and, as I so, dan is an author, three-time author, a motivational speaker and a sales trainer, and he's got some amazing science behind it that will help you with any kind of transformation journey that you might have.
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And he deals with more on the scientific mind side of it mindset side.
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But before we get into all that great stuff, dan, please let us know what was it like in your childhood, where did you grow up, what was the complement of your family and what was it like to be Dan as a kid?
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I grew up in a city in England called Bristol it's about two hours west of London and I had a very good childhood, my parents growing up.
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Actually, they both divorced and went on to find partners that were far better suited for them, but luckily me and my brother came along before that point and then I spent actually my childhood growing up in the middle of the countryside, in fact on a hill.
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I can't write this.
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It was the countryside, in fact, on a hill.
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I can't write this.
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It's on a hill.
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I would do a very small school.
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There are 47 people in the school, including teachers.
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In my class there was three kids, and so you've got to imagine this hill and we'd have to walk to school.
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But this was back in the day, right when there weren't any crazy people around that there are today.
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So my parents just, yeah, just walked down this farm lane, say hello to the tractors, all those kind of things and actually growing up.
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And we're going to talk about fitness today.
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I had quite a good fitness upbringing.
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My stepdad liked to run, he liked to play squash.
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He would run across the hills.
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I don't make it sound like you live on a prairie, I didn't.
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It was very close to the city but as kids we would cycle after him so we'd do that and as I grew up, that kind of fitness thing became part and part of growing up.
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I played soccer as a kid, I played cricket and learned all sorts of sports growing up, so fitness was a big part of it.
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But yeah, eventually we moved from Bristol to Gloucester.
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Then I won't go into it too much, but ended up just finding some passion for fitness and training in the gym from like 14, 15.
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This was back in the days before Instagram and all the kids who were in the gym Me and my brother thought we were trying to lift these things around and ended up going to university studying this idea of fitness.
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I wasn't good enough at the fitness side at the point, so I had to back it up with some academics, so I weirdly got a sports and maths background.
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In theory I'm really good at counting press-ups, although I definitely, but that was it really.
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And then, I guess a few years later, I went back to study a little bit more about the science of sport and a friend of mine said hey, you should listen to this.
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At the time he gave me a CD and it was about neuro-linguistic programming, so I think you might like this.
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And that one moment was the start of my, I guess, love affair with psychology and the understanding of the brain, knowing that we're going to push ourselves physically but actually it's the brain and the mind and the wiring that we have internally that's going to define a lot of the success or non-success that we're going to get in life.
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All right.
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Well, that's great, but we need to step back a little bit.
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You, like, ran through that.
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I'd never had anybody run through that fast.
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So you've got a brother, yep, older, younger, a year and a half.
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We were quite close, yeah, excellent.
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And when you so, you played, you had sports.
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You'd mentioned soccer, which we know you actually called football.
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All right, yeah, no, we'll come to that because I played football as well.
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My main sport when I got to university was football.
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I was quarterback for the university team.
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I ended up playing for Great Britain.
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I played in the States against Menlo College in San Francisco, played in Finland and I played all the way up until about four or five years ago.
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Wait, a second, wait.
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Yeah, I was always told.
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First of all, I was always told, if you're in Great Britain, soccer is football, football, football, right.
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So when did that change?
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Has that changed in your lifetime?
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Yeah, there's still the community, right.
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So in England football is football, football's a round one.
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In fact, in about an hour's time we're going to be competing for the European Cup right, the England team.
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Okay, the european cup right, the england team okay.
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But there's also a big passionate group of people that like gridiron or american football or I would call that football english people would call it american and I remember growing up actually watching it on tv.
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This was back in the days where budweiser sponsored kind of the ball and stuff like that, and I remember watching games.
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I loved the kind of excitement and the passion and speed of American football, watching it.
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As a kid I got the plastic balls.
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We'd throw them around with kids on the street and stuff.
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And actually there was a team in my hometown where I grew up and as a kid I think it was like 15, 16, I just started to go along and play with the ball and throw it around.
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And then when I got to university there was a team there and I was seeing captain football, cricket, rugby and stuff.
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At school I did okay with sport and then I got to university I was like what sport am I going to play?
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And there was this team saying, oh, do you want to come play american football?
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I thought I've never tried it, let's jump into it.
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And I loved it.
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What can I say?
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It's it was.
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It was a sport I really enjoyed.
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I loved the, the psychology side of it.
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You're trying to outwit your opponent, but I love the physicality of it because it's high speed, it's high impact, unless you're me and you play quarterback, which I avoid all of that and you try and stay in the kind of cognitive and thinking space In the pocket.
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Yeah, so that's it's God.
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That's really interesting because you know, I'm a little bit older than you and I had never thought that.
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I had no clue that in England they were actually playing American football.
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That's's typically about three regular season games in the uk.
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I think they've got some in germany.
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They're trying to push them into mexico as well.
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So it's yeah, and every game sells out like.
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I've been to wembley, seen the twickenham is packed and I think the english crowd is starting to appreciate it more.
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I think in the back when I was playing it was oh, this is crazy.
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What do you just take the pads off?
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Now everyone sees the athleticism because these guys on the pitch professional footballers, american footballers.
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They're the best athletes in the world Strongest, fastest, and they're going against the other guy who's the second hardest and they're still rocking a hard pace.
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It's one of those kind of things.
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So I think it is growing in popularity.
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People, those kind of things.
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So I think it is growing in popularity.
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People love to see it.
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Will we ever get a franchise in uk?
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I don't think so, but it's nice to dream.
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It's just so interesting that you say that, because we all think that in america we're like think no, football is actually slow because it's play, stop huddle, figure it out.
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Talk to the coach boba okay, now another, another 11 second play, okay, let's go, let's stop huddle again.
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So we all think it's slow and we think soccer is fast because it's 90 minutes of it doesn't stop, it's back and forth, except you only stop for timeouts and to throw in the ball.
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Yeah, and it's a different type of scene, right?
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I mean, if you ask my wife which is better, she doesn't like soccer anyway, but she's come to watch me play games and it's boring, especially the amateur game in England.
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It is very slow, but it's.
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I think the moments of game, like when you're actually playing, it's that it's six seconds of just let's go as hard and as fast as we can.
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I love rugby.
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I think the rugby game is amazing, but rugby always looking there, right, it's always just in front of you.
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You can predict what's going to happen.
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If you see someone coming, you tend to slow down or do whatever you protect in football.
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It's this all angles.
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You've got to keep your head on the swivel sort of thing, and it's also.
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Here's one thing I do like this.
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It's a perfection.
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There's an element of perfection to it that you need to have.
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The execution of football is different to every other sport.
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Like, as a quarterback, you throw the ball, it's got to be in exactly the right spot.
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Your wide receiver might make play, but it's got to be there.
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In football, you make a pass.
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Oh, it doesn't matter.
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Right, it's gone.
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Someone runs after it.
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I'll get another go in a second.
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It's not like that.
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It's that.
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So it's that pressure element with athleticism.
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Plus the out-thinking the opponent.
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I don't know, there's a unique combination.
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I've never heard it explained that way and I think you're absolutely 100 correct.
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I love watching football just as much as the next guy.
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And oh yeah, just to give you this one.
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So I'm from chicago, right, and I live in tampa, not the last time, the time before that.
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We don't.
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We only get a match-up between chicago and tampa every four years, and I was.
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It was going to be here at Tampa, tampa was going to be the home team.
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I'm like, getting ready to, I'm going to buy tickets, I'm going to go, and that was the year they did it in England.
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Sorry about that.
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Next time.
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Because we only play every four years and then it's opposite.
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So I really preferred them to come to Tampa no-transcript.
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So where did you move to, when, or where did you end up residing when you got out of school?
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I went home for a bit.
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I went to work at a gym, I got my degree and I went back into fitness and started.
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There's scientific knowledge about how the body works and so I'll go and work in the gym.
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First person I got to speak to with this little old lady.
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She was like 74 years old and wanted to know how to use the treadmill and, like you, don't want to know about muscle contraction and all the energetic pathways.
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No, she did not and that's what inspired me to go back to school and like back to university did my master's in physiology was I wanted to work with athletes.
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Like I love competition, I like peak performance level, so I do love the gym.
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I think there was a lot of people go there and it's a great place for people to start the journey.
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I also like to challenge myself and see, okay, well, how can we push the top end the envelope as well?
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But I never made it.
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I never actually got to work with athletes because I fell into this psychology thing and then it turns out that a whole bunch of people in business need psychology as well.
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So that kicked off.
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You mentioned about the sales training going and teaching salespeople and sales leaders how to get in the right headspace to influence people and how other people think and how we can influence that thought as well.
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Where was that?
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So tell me about that transition.
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So you went to school, you were doing physiology, someone gives you an nlp book and then how?
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So how did you?
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Where was the transition there to go into sales?
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so I love the nlp and I thought, right, I'm gonna go and study this.
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And because I don't know, I haven't grown out of it yet.
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So if it's a phase, I don't know, but it's a long phase of being a student for life.
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So I I thought, right, here's a great idea, I want to go and study it some more.
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So I went to this school and enrolled in the NLP practitioner master practitioner course, got on with the guys there and they were teaching open courses.
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People go and learn this kind of more of a coachy type, therapeutic-y style NLP.
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And then they got this contract for teaching it to business people and the guys who I studied with is a genius, absolutely amazing guy, but you should not put him in a boardroom.
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And he knew that, he knew his limitation and so he said, dan, do you want to do?
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You want to go and teach this stuff to these people over there?
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They're graduates, they're coming into their first sales role.
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Let's go and teach them some nlp.
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And so I thought, why not?
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Let's try it, let's go do it.
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So did it spent, I think it was, three days at his house getting downloaded.
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It's like the matrix basically.
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Probably it's like nlp when it's all these kids.
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I say kids.
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It was barely just in front of them and it was a two-week nl sales training course and I sucked.
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It was the worst training I've ever given.
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But you learn and you get better over time.
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And what I quickly realized is that salespeople don't want to learn NLP, they don't want to learn neurolinguistic programming, they want to learn how to sell and the techniques from NLP are very helpful for salespeople.
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And so I guess over the next few years I was trying to say well, how can we teach sales?
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How do I learn the language of sales?
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How do I embed these ideas so I can talk to them in their language and not just sound like some kind of crazy advocate for some psychology thing at the front them?
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They hit me up on linkedin.
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They say some of them are running their own companies now.
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Some of them have been on the apprentice and they've done extremely well and won that and they, you know, grown their own companies, the heads of sales at companies now.
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So I've got some pretty good students in my alumni.
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I'm not going to take the credit, but at least I was part of the journey and gave them some like impetus or education that they appreciate, I think yeah, I think us as coaches and I always I get that too.
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I'm like, hey, you know what?
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I got my PR because of you.
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And I'm like, no, you didn't get it because of me, you did it because of you.
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Let me ask you a question who did all the work?
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She goes well, you gave me, you guided me yeah, guided.
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You put in all the work.
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You ran all those miles, you swam all those miles, you biked all those miles.
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You're the one that did it all.
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I just gave you an idea of how to get there, so, and motivated you.
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That's it.
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So this is all on you.
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So I love the way you said that that was perfect.
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So you know what?
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I think this is a good segue.
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Let can you define nlp as well as roughly as you can.
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Let's say, 30 000 foot view, cool.
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So nlp, I think, is a language to explain what's going on in people's heads as they do certain things.
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So it's actually it's a technology or a set of tools that were designed by a couple of guys one was a lingu linguist, one was a computer programmer and they said let's look at excellence in therapy and coaching in this kind of world of people manipulating people's brains, and let's see what we can figure out and let's give it some kind of structure.
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So they would look at hypnotists, and at the time you're a hypnotist and you could hypnotize people, but nobody really understood how.
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And so they looked at it and said, okay, well, we can break it down.
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It's these processes and we're going to give it a language so that we can teach other people.
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Or they would look at people building rapport.
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Right, who's really good at building rapport?
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Okay, what is it they're doing?
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How are they using their body, how are they using language, how are they using tonality, all those kind of things?
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We know it, we can go and teach it, and so I guess it was an element of codifying or giving a language to something that was previously a bit fluffy and now could be replicated in multiple different contexts.
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So I think that's probably what NLP is.
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It's a language that you can use to explain psychological processes that are going on in a way that is fairly easy to understand.
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Excellent NLP Neural Linguistic Programming.
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Yep.
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So think about you're doing some programming and you've got two aspects You've got the brain and you've got your words and trying to figure out how people are wired and change your wiring as a result.
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Yeah, that totally makes sense for sales.
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Neural Linguistic Programming in a way to speak to the person in order to entice.
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Well, for lack of a better term, manipulate I like that word, that's a good word.
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Yeah, well, I mean basically what it is.
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I'll give you an example.
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I'll give you a quick example.
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This is what I learned.
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So I did some sales training myself, so this is what I was always taught One of the greatest things they talk about leading questions, right?
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So if I ask you Dan, I'm like Dan, so right now you're in Prague, right?
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Yep, okay, great, where is some of the places that you love to vacation?
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We just went to the Greek islands.
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Very nice.
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We're going to New York, or move to New York.
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Had a vacation in New York, anywhere with sunshine, yeah.
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Okay, anywhere with sunshine, yeah, okay.
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So if I was standing next to you, I'd be telling you hey, I'm going to prove to you that you're not here.
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Okay, all right.
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So you love going to New York.
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It's one of the places you'd like to go to and you're going to move there, but you're not there right now.
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Right, no, not yet Right.
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And you like going to the Greek islands, but you're not there yet either.
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Correct, right.
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And then what was the third one?
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San Francisco.
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Anywhere with sunshine.
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So yeah, we'll go anywhere.