When life threw her the ultimate curveball, Meridith Alexander stood strong; her story of turning anguish into action is one that will stir your soul and challenge your understanding of resilience. Alongside her daughter Schuyler, who embodies courage and tenacity, they share an intimate tale of perseverance and the indomitable human spirit. Embark on a journey through their lives, from Meridith's youthful aspirations in the ballet world, sidetracked by life's harsh critiques, to Schuyler's inspiring recovery from a devastating accident abroad that tested their family's strength and unity.
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When life threw her the ultimate curveball, Meridith Alexander stood strong; her story of turning anguish into action is one that will stir your soul and challenge your understanding of resilience. Alongside her daughter Schuyler, who embodies courage and tenacity, they share an intimate tale of perseverance and the indomitable human spirit. Embark on a journey through their lives, from Meridith's youthful aspirations in the ballet world, sidetracked by life's harsh critiques, to Schuyler's inspiring recovery from a devastating accident abroad that tested their family's strength and unity.
Navigating through the intense emotional terrain of a family in crisis, we uncover the remarkable narratives of Rhea and Sia, whose extraordinary achievements set the backdrop for Schuyler's fight for survival. Witness the mother-daughter duo's mastery of the inner game, demonstrating how unwavering focus, positive language, and a powerful imagination can not only conquer personal adversities but also inspire a community of supporters. Their experiences are a clarion call to anyone facing their own battles, illustrating the incredible power of belief and the human capacity to emerge stronger from the depths of despair.
The episode culminates with transformative insights into achieving inner game mastery. Listeners will learn how to apply the principles of focus, language, and imagination to their own lives, unlocking the door to untapped potential. As Meridith and Schuyler's journey unfolds, we see the embodiment of the phrase "I am possible" and the realization that, sometimes, our greatest adversities lead us to discover our truest strengths. Join us for an episode that's more than just a podcast – it's a life lesson in harnessing the power of the mind to overcome the unthinkable.
Contact Meridith Alexander
Website: GritMindsetAcademy
Instagram: @MeridithAlexander
Facebook: @SchuyIsTheLimit
X(Twitter): @MeridithHAlexan
LinkedIn: Meridith Hankenson Alexander
YouTube: @UnleashTheEpicYou
Contact Brad @ Life Changing Challengers
Instagram: @bradaminus
Facebook: @bradaminus
X(Twitter): @bradaminus
YouTube: @lifechangingchallengers
LifeChangingChallengers.com
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All right, and thank you for joining us on another episode of Life Changing Challengers.
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I'm so humbled and honored to have Meredith Alexander and Skylar with us today.
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Very amazing woman who is a shining beacon in this world.
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Both of them are just like amazingly positive, incredible people.
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And so Meredith owns the Grit Mindset Academy, and we'll get into that a little bit later.
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She's written two books.
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The first one is called the Sky is the Limit.
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The second one is 100 Days of Epic and just really excited to have you both with me today.
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Thank you so much for joining us.
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Thank you so much for having us.
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We are super excited to be here and hello to your anybody who's listening out there.
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We are honored to have you here.
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Do you see what I'm talking about?
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You see how the positivity just radiates off these women.
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It's amazing.
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It's amazing.
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So, all right, so you know what.
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I literally start off the same way, because I really love to have the audience have a good connection.
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So, meredith, can you tell us a little bit about how you grew up?
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What was your family compliment like what was the environment where you grew up, and tell us a little about your childhood?
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Sure, sure.
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So I was the only child, and, just as here in Tampa there are many military brats, I was what you might call an entertainment brat, because both of my parents were in the entertainment industry.
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My father ran one of the big amphitheaters in upstate New York.
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When I was growing up, my mom was on tour as a singer, so I actually grew up surrounded by some of the celebrities when I was a little girl.
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I mean, we're talking, I am going to date myself, but everyone from like Jim Morrison of the Doors before he died, janis Joplin, bobby Sherman if you are back into the little teeny boppy things, frank Sinatra, you name it but my passion ended up being the New York City Ballet, and so I was convinced that I was going to be a principal ballerina with the New York City Ballet.
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That was my dream.
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I was dancing every spare moment.
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I was also really good in school, but I was one of those that was like, yeah, okay, whatever, I'd rather be dancing, and so I was on the real fast track for it.
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I was in New York City Ballet's Nutcracker when I was little and was a child, one of the children, a candy cane, and in their production of Firebird, so it really looked like I was on my way.
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And then, when I was about 13 or 14, some cracks started developing.
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My parents announced to me that they were getting a divorce, and so it was a little bit of a tug of war of where was I going to live with whom?
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How was I going to spend my time?
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I going to live with whom, how was I going to spend my time?
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So one great path of least resistance seemed to be how about prep school?
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And so I was not particularly fond of the idea.
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But I did have some friends were going, who?
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So I thought maybe the adults in my life were saying friends were going.
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So I thought maybe the adults in my life were saying oh yes, if you were talented academically, you do not want to be a ballet dancer.
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And yet I had this little voice inside of me that said no, this is who you were meant to be.
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So I walked in to my beloved ballet teacher's audition for her spring production and kind of everybody knew that this was kind of just a formality, because clearly I was going to be cast in the role of the little match girl, which was the leading role.
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And so I start the audition and, shockingly, my beloved ballet teacher would not look at me.
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It was as if I was invisible.
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And it was so noticeable that, when I went back into the dressing room, all my little friends were saying what was up with Miss Marla?
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And she wouldn't even look at you.
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And so, of course, I'm getting back into the car with my mom.
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How did it go?
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Fine?
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What do you think?
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Yeah, it was fine.
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And so that moment of real first kind of shock and transformation came the next week when I got back and as I saw my friends looking at the cast list on the bulletin board and then saw their expressions on their face when they looked at me and it's that horrible look when people don't know what to say to you.
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So not only was I not cast as the little match girl, but I ended up in the court of ballet with all the little girls.
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And so what?
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Yes, with all the little girls.
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And so what?
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Yes.
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So what that meant to me was that not only had I humiliated myself and failed at this, but that horrible little voice that had been so certain, that had, to my knowledge, never led me astray, could never be trusted again, because that was the source of.
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Clearly, the way other people saw me was not how I saw myself, and so that was the last ballet I ever did.
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I agreed to go to prep school.
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I went on to prep school and continued with my life.
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I went to.
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I hated prep school initially as a child.
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It was incredibly high pressure, but I did really well.
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I finally worked my way to the point where, even in English class, I was awarded one of five A's that this one professor had given in 30 years.
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And so I thought, oh my gosh, ok, well, maybe I can be, I can be a writer, I love to write, I can be a writer.
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And so I go to Georgetown and I get enrolled in honors English class and of course she asked for a sample of our writing and I'm like here, write my A paper, and I get it back the exact same paper, c plus over, d minus, and that was it.
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That was finally like OK, the moment I'm starting to think okay, maybe I can trust this little boy.
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After all, that was the total shutdown.
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So from there, that really shaped me for decades of my life going forward, where I said you know what, I'm not going to chase a dream, I'm just going to chase a living, because that seems to be the way to do it.
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However, I couldn't help but notice that, as great as my education was, it wasn't teaching us how to choose to live.
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And so that's when I first encountered Plato, socrates, the Stoics, and it was as if a part of me came alive in that moment and that became the through line that kind of laced through all the other bits of my life and led me to study Aikido, study energy, study, tai Chi and really and Eastern philosophy, and I even traveled around and lived out of my truck, exploring Canada for about nine months at one point, until finally, lo and behold, I ended up back in New York and met Skylar's father, who was my Aikido instructor.
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Ah, that's where Eric Howell got be okay, yes, indeed, and so skyler's evolution is.
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It's actually a fascinating story in that my I am born on july 4th, which is somewhat of a holiday.
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Skyler has only heard the story like thousands of millions of times.
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So my mom made a passing comment that, oh, wouldn't it be remarkable because the baby's due date the first baby, not Skylar was early January.
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Wouldn't it be amazing if your child was born on Christmas?
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Well, I kind of perk up and go that is a fabulous idea.
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So I walk around telling everybody the OBGYN, the policeman on the corner I'm born on July 4th, so my baby's going to be born on Christmas.
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And of course people are kind of patting me on my head, going like sure he is.
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Well, lo and behold, to the music of the Star Trek Enterprise, boom, my water breaks and my first child is truly born on Christmas.
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So fast forward to my second pregnancy.
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Well, the due date is in early April and I say, oh, my gosh holiday, oh, april Fool's Day, because I'm born on July 4th, and now my son is born on Christmas.
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So once again, I walk around telling everybody my OBGYN, the lady who does the laundry.
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I'm like yep, that's when they're coming.
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And of course they're like mm-hmm.
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However, their father did not want to know the sex of this child, so I went through the whole charade of pretending to pick out a boy's name when I knew it was going to be a girl.
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Well, as it so happened, I have an uncle wait for it, skylar who was born on April Fool's Day.
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And I was so sure that this baby would be born on April Fool's Day that I said if it's a boy, it's going to be Skylar.
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Well, sure enough, my other daughter was born on April Fool's Day and, lo and behold, we have a surprise guest showing up on the menu.
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That's our third child.
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Our third child because I, of course, am going.
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Well, of course, we left a name in the universe.
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We left the name Skylar.
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So, boy or girl, this child is going to be named Skylar and, by the way, he or she will be born on Memorial Day.
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Bill, what is your?
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birthday Skylar.
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I'm really young, so I know, so awesome.
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You're just about.
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So that's right around the corner.
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So it's like so you're going to be 31?
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.
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Yeah, very good.
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Oh great.
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So Lyndon is born on December 22nd.
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Correct yeah.
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And is it Shada?
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Sia, sia and Sia is born on April Fool's Day.
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Yeah.
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And Skylar is born on Memorial Day.
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Yes Wow.
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That's great.
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It is day, yes.
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You know what?
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It's amazing.
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I don't.
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I've never done an episode just on myself, so I try to sprinkle little things in here, and I've, and usually what it is how it comes out is comparisons with my guests.
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So I'm just going to tell you right now and a lot of people don't even know about me because I put this away but I in high school I started ballet, tap and jazz ballet, tap and jazz and I ended up doing it for 12 years and I was in New York for a little while.
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Mostly, most of the time, it was Chicago, where I grew up doing musical theater, dance shows, the whole bit, just like you.
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When I got here to Florida, I had been in the military for a while and I got here to Florida and right after my second tour in the military I got agents out here and I performed at the straws.
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I've performed at different spots, so I'm there with you on.
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I'm totally there with you on that.
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So we have that in common and yeah, so let's tell, say again oh, I was.
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I've been in numerous ones.
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I actually, I actually I actually was better in studio theater than I was in musical theater.
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But I've done Cabaret, I've done Jekyll and Hyde like three times.
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Show Boat, Damn Yankees.
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I did Damn Yankees at the Straws twice Come on.
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I'm going to get nice.
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Oh yeah, see.
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So you and then I also had performed with the Spanish Lyric Opera and we did a.
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We did a Spanish opera.
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I forgot what they called it, but they did it, but so that was cool.
00:13:38.602 --> 00:13:44.724
So yeah, I'm right there with you and realized that I did some semi-pro stuff, but it never.
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But again, whenever I tried for the big stuff, I got the same reaction.
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So you know.
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So, as a footnote to my ballet story is I and this is to anyone who is listening who has been very quick to squash their own dreams and who has been very quick to squash their own dreams and who has really taken one failure or even two failures and not been willing to give themselves kind of a thousand second chances.
00:14:17.455 --> 00:14:28.456
I found out in my 50s, after I really had gone through decades distrusting that little voice.
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I happened to mention to my mom in passing the whole little match girl trauma for me, because for me that was trauma.
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This was my dream getting ripped away, and she got this really strange look on her face and what she revealed to me is that my father had just been really late on paying my ballet teacher the bill, because he didn't see the point of me taking dance anymore if we're going to be going to boarding school, yes.
00:15:07.096 --> 00:15:20.956
And so she was frustrated and decided that she could not give me the leading role if the bill hadn't been paid.
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So I went through my entire life believing that it was me, when really it was circumstances that had zero to do with me.
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And so if anyone is listening at this point and has been assuming the worst and really convincing themselves to play small because of something that was out of their control.
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I would really encourage you to remember our story and use that dream even if you had like a failure, quote, unquote, in your past to use it really as a reminder of what a capacity to dream you actually have and to ensure that as you go forward in your second, your third, your fourth, your fifth, your sixth, your 100th attempt, that you stay true to the belief that one of these is going to hop and that you learn from each of these and you grow from each of these.
00:16:27.418 --> 00:16:28.804
Yeah, failure is not the end.
00:16:28.804 --> 00:16:36.293
It's a learning experience, and you actually can't succeed without failure, because you can't learn unless you fail.
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So failure is a stepping stone.
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It's not the end.
00:16:40.419 --> 00:17:00.375
And it's a necessary part of the recipe because if you look at virtually anyone who is considered a huge success story, the process is the moments where it's not working Course correct, it's not working Course correct, it's not working Course correct.
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Iterate, look again, reassess, evaluate and do they have any more luck than any of the rest of us?
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No, do they have any more connections?
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Not usually.
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It's usually that perseverance and that commitment simply to keep going and not give up.
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I have a belief that epic right, which is my thing epic is simply when your desire to create a miracle is greater than your desire to give in.
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That's beautiful, it's powerful, it's powerful.
00:17:38.824 --> 00:17:39.886
I got one more little.
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I got one little more comparison between the two.
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When I was 12, I started Taekwondo and Aikido.
00:17:45.909 --> 00:17:47.011
We'll just stop with that.
00:17:47.011 --> 00:17:48.727
So that's what I'm saying.
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There's a lot of similarities between our lives.
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Can I ask a question?
00:17:55.027 --> 00:18:07.684
Of course, and when Ren plays the character, a lot of the time the whole cast is like a character.
00:18:07.684 --> 00:18:09.309
What was your character?
00:18:09.309 --> 00:18:10.941
What?
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was your character in Rent.
00:18:13.266 --> 00:18:15.130
Oh, in Rent I was Coarse.
00:18:15.130 --> 00:18:20.694
Yeah, I was Coarse Dancer, but I would have.
00:18:20.694 --> 00:18:24.269
I wanted to play Roger more than anything in the world, yeah.
00:18:24.269 --> 00:18:27.606
So yeah, I didn't even work.
00:18:27.606 --> 00:18:37.055
I mean I like Mark, but actually Roger's a baritone tenor so I could hit those notes.
00:18:37.055 --> 00:18:43.413
Mark is more of a high tenor so I could hit some of those notes even if I wanted to.
00:18:43.740 --> 00:18:48.288
My very first crush, Adam Pascal.
00:18:48.469 --> 00:18:49.411
Adam Pascal.
00:18:49.411 --> 00:19:00.509
I saw the very first time I saw Rent with the original cast and I was, oh, it gets even better, because I didn't think we were going to see it.
00:19:00.509 --> 00:19:20.481
But Rent is the first set of the first play that they put on, where they did what they called rent rush, where you go in like five o'clock before the eight o'clock curtain and you get in line and you get a raffle ticket and if you win and if you get chosen, they raffle off the front row.
00:19:20.481 --> 00:19:33.759
Now at the, at the n, at the Niederlander theater, the front row is not actually the greatest of seats, because you're kind of looking up like this right, it's not the greatest seats, it's still.
00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:35.244
They're still good, don't get me wrong.
00:19:35.244 --> 00:19:36.769
But I ended, we didn't.
00:19:36.940 --> 00:19:44.500
I ended up getting a pair of tickets and I literally I could have reached up and touched their toes when they were on the edge of the screen.
00:19:44.500 --> 00:19:51.634
Yeah, yeah, it was totally on a whim and it was cold and it was.
00:19:51.634 --> 00:19:56.886
But we're like, oh, we're going to see, we're going to find out, we at least got to try.
00:19:56.886 --> 00:19:58.053
We at least got to try, because you couldn't get tickets.
00:19:58.053 --> 00:19:58.575
I mean, it was just no way.
00:19:58.575 --> 00:19:59.579
I mean you're talking about?
00:19:59.579 --> 00:20:06.323
You're talking about Adam Pascal and I mean, and all of them, they were just, they were just amazing, and I'm losing.
00:20:06.323 --> 00:20:09.150
I totally blanked out where the rest of them?
00:20:09.150 --> 00:20:13.186
But I usually can rattle them off like this so, but yeah, so, but anyway.
00:20:13.186 --> 00:20:13.426
Yeah.
00:20:13.426 --> 00:20:22.492
Anthony Rapp, the guy that plays on on the irrefutable new program that was also in Law and Order Forever, jesse Jesse, not Jesse Spencer.
00:20:22.492 --> 00:20:26.807
No, not Jenny, jesse Owens.
00:20:26.807 --> 00:20:27.730
But you won't figure it out.
00:20:27.730 --> 00:20:32.548
We will figure it out, warren Broward, if you are listening to this podcast.
00:20:32.680 --> 00:20:36.063
We want you to put in the comments who is it that we can't?
00:20:36.104 --> 00:20:38.590
figure out right now.
00:20:38.590 --> 00:20:42.086
I have a funny story.
00:20:42.086 --> 00:20:57.083
On the way to my high school we were singing La Valenne and it's the opera that my friends based on, and then my nephew just that couple of friends.
00:20:57.083 --> 00:21:08.184
I went to Sochi instead of doing the Irish short song that everyone went to and Tay Diggs walked in.
00:21:08.726 --> 00:21:09.407
Tay Diggs.
00:21:11.451 --> 00:21:15.188
Yes, it was so cool.
00:21:15.188 --> 00:21:19.285
I've never seen that before.
00:21:19.285 --> 00:21:22.597
I was a Lennon's.
00:21:25.691 --> 00:21:27.076
Oh, but La Boheme is great.
00:21:27.076 --> 00:21:28.636
I have a friend who still lives in New York.
00:21:28.636 --> 00:21:36.576
She studied at the Manhattan School of Music and he played in, and I used to go to New York all the time to go watch him because he was at.
00:21:36.576 --> 00:21:40.798
He was at the Lincoln Center and he was performing with the New York City Opera.
00:21:40.798 --> 00:21:50.536
So I saw him play in La Boheme, and La Boheme is amazing, absolutely amazing, but nothing like a little bit better than that.
00:21:50.536 --> 00:21:59.121
But anyway, god, we could talk about this stuff forever and I bet you, even though we're letting this go, I'm sure people are going to get a kick out of it.
00:21:59.121 --> 00:22:00.791
They usually do so.
00:22:00.791 --> 00:22:03.978
Okay, you had skylar, and where are you living at this point?
00:22:04.558 --> 00:22:07.564
So at this point we were living in Tampa.
00:22:07.564 --> 00:22:18.378
So we moved here to Tampa after living in New York City, which is where my oldest son was born, and so now we're here in Tampa.
00:22:18.378 --> 00:22:27.970
And Skylar's middle name because her dad was Japanese, so her middle name literally means happiness.
00:22:27.970 --> 00:22:30.413
In Japanese it is Sachi.
00:22:30.413 --> 00:22:38.525
And so we were here and Sky was fearless from the outset.
00:22:38.525 --> 00:22:46.934
I mean, by the time she was like five years old she had broken both arms twice.
00:22:46.934 --> 00:23:00.144
So at least she was fair, she was a monk and bar queen, and the only problem is that every now and then they got wet, which and unfortunately I was never with her, or maybe unfortunately when she broke her arm I would get the call.
00:23:00.144 --> 00:23:13.213
When she broke her arm, I would get the call, and sometimes it would be 26 voice messages from my mom going Meredith, where are you?
00:23:13.213 --> 00:23:19.423
Like when I would be at a conference out of town, or it would just be the Montessori, like Miss Meredith.
00:23:19.983 --> 00:23:22.146
I'm so sorry to call you.
00:23:23.849 --> 00:23:25.237
I think Skyler had it.
00:23:25.237 --> 00:23:28.516
I will let you know.
00:23:28.516 --> 00:23:30.655
Great to the orthopedic, yeah.
00:23:32.653 --> 00:23:33.637
I can't even imagine.
00:23:33.637 --> 00:23:37.038
And did you have the same orthopedist that saw her every single time?
00:23:37.038 --> 00:23:37.760
Oh, yes.
00:23:39.173 --> 00:23:45.049
And we had gone through all the cute little designs that were available for the cast.
00:23:45.049 --> 00:23:52.182
I mean the bright colors, the tie-dye, that teddy bear, they oh, that was right, they were out of it.
00:23:52.182 --> 00:23:57.875
That's a big disappointment, almost worth going for number five.
00:23:57.875 --> 00:24:04.623
But I had to cut her off at that point I was like the nose yeah, skylar, this is starting to get a little expensive.
00:24:05.346 --> 00:24:27.925
But now that I think about it, we should like we should go over to the coast guard place over here and tell them that they have to rename a ship and call it the ss arakawa oh yeah for sure, for sure but you know, sky outside, I was fearless, not only physically, but also just she.
00:24:28.125 --> 00:24:40.424
We had a turning point where I actually her dad and I were no longer together and I found myself in an abusive relationship.
00:24:40.424 --> 00:24:44.319
In fact, abusive relationship number one of two, thank you very much.
00:24:44.319 --> 00:24:48.914
In fact, abusive relationship number one of two, thank you very much.
00:24:48.914 --> 00:24:59.516
Another lesson to your viewers that you can definitely overcome that, and that's a whole nother topic here, but it is one that should ultimately end up being empowering to you as you get beyond it.
00:24:59.516 --> 00:25:04.181
But it gave me the opportunity because I was still very much.
00:25:04.521 --> 00:25:20.554
It drew me back into learning how some people dealt with formidable challenges and emerged as bigger, bolder versions of themselves, while some people were absolutely crushed.
00:25:20.554 --> 00:25:31.747
And so it was that really immersion back into the differentiating factor was always the inner game.
00:25:31.747 --> 00:25:34.459
It was always came back to the inner game.
00:25:34.459 --> 00:26:08.550
And so I went kind of back to that root of the Eastern medicine, the Aikido, all that, and I had a conversation with Skylar after one really kind of uncomfortable moment with this one particular man and really reinforced to her that just because people are quote unquote grown up doesn't mean that they don't have their own challenges and their own issues and that their issues are reflection on you.
00:26:08.550 --> 00:26:19.251
And it was like an unfolding for her, because at this point I really started listening to a lot of Abraham Hicks, esther, Hicks.
00:26:19.712 --> 00:26:31.378
I became a huge fan, and so it was really in that moment where Skylar blossomed as a human being and became a total yes, girl.
00:26:31.378 --> 00:26:48.407
She really wanted to keep up with her older brother and sister, incredibly smart, ended up just going academically and until, ultimately, she ended up at Yale.
00:26:48.407 --> 00:26:57.242
Her first venture abroad was Mom, I think I have a great idea for spring vacation.
00:26:57.242 --> 00:27:00.532
I think I'm going to go to Tanzania.
00:27:00.532 --> 00:27:08.464
I was like, oh okay, so is there a group with Yale that is going to Tanzania?
00:27:08.464 --> 00:27:12.400
No, I just think I would be a fun place to go.
00:27:12.400 --> 00:27:18.590
So I found a place called Art in Tanzania and, yeah, I'm going to go by myself, and I was.
00:27:18.590 --> 00:27:35.482
So that became the beginning of Sky doing these epic things visiting like out of the seven continents, teaching English to monks in Nepal, going to Ecuador, going to Croatia, all kinds of things.
00:27:35.482 --> 00:27:54.315
I mean I literally, without exaggeration, can say that she positively impacted the world by the time she was 22, more than most people do by the time that they were in their whole lives.
00:27:54.915 --> 00:28:07.372
Yeah, that's amazing yeah, thank you, yes, yes, so can I ask, just before we delve into some of this, about about lyndon and saya, what are they doing and where are they right now?
00:28:07.893 --> 00:28:19.311
so lyndon, and so I called him as a little boy ryu because that was, and when he was little he wanted nothing to do then with the name of lyndon.
00:28:19.311 --> 00:28:20.913
Realist is real is technically.
00:28:20.913 --> 00:28:27.057
Rhea was technically his middle name, and so Rhea was a dynamo.
00:28:27.057 --> 00:28:30.077
He set the bar really high for his sisters.
00:28:30.077 --> 00:28:32.579
Also, incredibly brilliant.
00:28:32.579 --> 00:28:36.622
He was the rock, the solid rock of our family.
00:28:36.622 --> 00:28:41.805
He was amazing, but he was very athletic.
00:28:41.805 --> 00:29:01.738
He ended up being one of the stars of his lacrosse team in college and then he went on after college to be one of Tampa Bay's 30 under 30, working with one of the major accounting firms here and then.
00:29:01.738 --> 00:29:02.397
So now he has moved on.
00:29:02.397 --> 00:29:09.814
He's midway through his 30s and he's chief financial officer of a big organization.
00:29:09.814 --> 00:29:12.078
Yeah, so he's doing fantastically.
00:29:12.519 --> 00:29:22.012
And then halfway, through his 30s, he's already in the C-suite, yes indeed.
00:29:22.853 --> 00:29:27.675
And her older sister is a force to be reckoned with as well.
00:29:27.675 --> 00:29:32.739
She is moving up the ranks of NBC, doing really well.
00:29:32.739 --> 00:29:41.403
Sia has two little boys, ryu has one, and then, of course, family to be continued.
00:29:41.403 --> 00:30:00.496
So they are both doing, they're both doing really remarkable things and I will say that they also, after the boulder fell, they just have been incredible siblings to Skylar.
00:30:00.715 --> 00:30:35.547
I mean Sia, for example, while working, living in Orlando, every single weekend, every single weekend, with the exception of her now husband's birthday weekend, every single weekend, for an entire year uninterrupted, she came on Friday to to man to visit either to miami or over to tampa, and she lived on the far side of orlando, so it was that was two and a half hours or land, miami was four.
00:30:35.547 --> 00:31:03.584
Every single weekend she made that trek to be at skylar's side and to give me a little bit of a breather when, in those first early days when Sky could literally not be left in a room alone because she couldn't sit up without being in danger of falling, Okay, so let's cut that right here before we get, because I really want to start the story and then roll that in, because this is a formidable part of this.
00:31:03.986 --> 00:31:08.300
Can I ask about just real quick because you mentioned Tampa and Miami what was going on in Miami?
00:31:09.251 --> 00:31:11.319
So that goes into our story.
00:31:11.760 --> 00:31:16.421
Okay, so let's continue.
00:31:16.421 --> 00:31:19.057
Okay, so everybody's doing well.
00:31:19.057 --> 00:31:30.161
Skylar is all over the world, and so she is in Columbia at this point, right, so technically she's in Peru.
00:31:30.201 --> 00:31:41.012
Yeah, so after you know, I did postgraduate fellowship in Peru, so I was supposed to be there for a year.
00:31:41.012 --> 00:32:05.826
I was supposed to be there for a year and I've been there for a couple months and my best friend's last future boss and I decided to take a vacation to Columbia and that happened on the second to last day.
00:32:14.190 --> 00:32:18.654
On the second to last day of I'll be held up there, yes, so so the setting is that sky had completed, so she's on a year-long fellowship.
00:32:18.654 --> 00:32:23.840
It was broken into four parts, four parts, sorry, three parts.
00:32:23.840 --> 00:32:45.021
So she just completed the first part, come home for Christmas and, on her way, headed back down to pick up the second leg, which the woman who was to be her boss in the second leg was her sister's age and had become her best friend in Peru.
00:32:45.021 --> 00:32:50.336
So the two of them decided to go down to Columbia and explore.
00:32:50.336 --> 00:32:52.040
They've heard that it was wonderful.
00:32:52.040 --> 00:32:54.272
They had like two weeks, something like that.
00:32:54.272 --> 00:33:07.844
Right, it was a long trip and she's sending me pictures of her literally rappelling down waterfalls and on these amazing beaches and doing all of these crazy things.
00:33:07.844 --> 00:33:31.934
And so that literally, yes, the day before she was supposed to return to Peru and pick up her fellowship, she and this young woman went on a rafting expedition, whitewater rafting, went through the dangerous part unscathed and then got to the grotto.
00:33:33.337 --> 00:33:51.471
And a few hours later is when I got the call, and the middle of a Friday afternoon, february 19, 2016, with Dana on the other end of the call, and at first I'm like, oh hi, dana yes, how are you?
00:33:51.471 --> 00:33:59.592
And then it starts, my mind starts going why is Dana calling me and Skylar's not calling me?
00:33:59.592 --> 00:34:05.723
And Dana, of course, is still traumatized because she's experienced what just happened.
00:34:05.723 --> 00:34:08.257
And I said where's Skylar?
00:34:08.257 --> 00:34:26.516
And she said I don't know how to tell you this, but Skylar's been in a terrible accident and I remember hearing her mumble something about this big boulder, this rock, something about this big boulder, this rock and it falling on Skylar.
00:34:26.516 --> 00:34:50.032
And I'm trying to, I'm in total denial, I'm trying to hear what she said and, of course, the part of my mind is going okay, just calm down, this can't.
00:34:50.032 --> 00:34:53.097
I mean, surely Skylar has, like, broken her leg and this is bad, but it'll be fine.
00:34:53.097 --> 00:34:56.983
And finally I get to the moment where I say, well, skylar's going to be okay, isn't she?
00:34:56.983 --> 00:35:15.161
And the pause there, where then her friend just said there are three doctors working on her right now, and they can't say you just need to get down here as soon as possible.
00:35:15.161 --> 00:35:29.422
And that moment of just putting the phone down and just, of course, at first, just this can't be happening.
00:35:29.422 --> 00:35:30.492
This can't be happening.
00:35:31.255 --> 00:35:48.380
We are supposed to have so much more time because, again, I had navigated being a single mom for years and years, thinking that once the kids had gotten to where they were now, that it would be fine, I would be able to breathe and I'd gotten through the worst of the worst.
00:35:48.380 --> 00:35:49.422
And now we'd have time.
00:35:49.422 --> 00:35:58.023
I would have time to kind of figure out who I am now, and the kids would go on and they would have all these wonderful things to look forward to.
00:35:58.023 --> 00:36:07.927
And now, all of a sudden, it was oh my gosh, skylar needs someone way more than me to be her mom right now.
00:36:07.927 --> 00:36:16.831
She needs someone who has millions and millions of dollars and who knows how to create a miracle, knows how to navigate these kinds of things.
00:36:17.753 --> 00:36:24.320
And it was a terrifying place to be initially.
00:36:24.320 --> 00:36:28.344
And so for the first few hours we're scrambling.
00:36:28.344 --> 00:36:37.565
But here's the interesting thing, brad, one in kind of my shock and realizing that I had zero idea what to do.
00:36:37.565 --> 00:36:40.795
I didn't even speak Spanish and this had happened in Colombia.
00:36:40.894 --> 00:36:49.653
All I knew about Columbia was what you would see in the movies, right, and so I put a tiny little post on Facebook.
00:36:49.653 --> 00:36:59.318
The woman who only posts about rescue puppies and chocolate put this little tiny post that said my youngest daughter.
00:36:59.318 --> 00:37:05.097
I just got a call and my youngest daughter has been seriously injured in Columbia, south America.
00:37:05.097 --> 00:37:09.713
If anyone has experience with this kind of thing, would you please reach out to me.
00:37:09.713 --> 00:37:28.797
And that is actually the very first post that is in our book the Sky is the Limit, because ultimately the book the Sky is the Limit captures all of the posts for the first four months and the whole unfolding and my phone just started blowing up.
00:37:28.797 --> 00:37:57.112
People started calling me because of course Skylar had friends all over the world and people were reaching out and there were people who knew people who were from Columbia and had office workers who were from Columbia and this and that and a few angels kind of evolved in the mix and a few hours later Saya and I were going to stay here in the United States to manage things here.
00:37:57.795 --> 00:38:08.172
Saya and I were racing to Tampa International only to be turned away by American Airlines, even though we had no luggage to check, and we told them the scenario.
00:38:08.172 --> 00:38:18.117
It was against their policy 45 minutes before the plane was supposed to take off to allow us to go on board.
00:38:18.117 --> 00:38:27.242
Needless to say, that didn't go over terribly well, especially with my son, but we ended up having him drive us down to Miami.
00:38:27.242 --> 00:38:44.864
So in the middle of the night, my oldest daughter and I boarded a flight to Bogota and then spent a couple hours in Bogota waiting for another flight that would take us to a town in Colombia that I still cannot pronounce to this day.
00:38:45.706 --> 00:38:59.719
Wook of my wonder or something like that, and then from there a four-hour drive to where Skylar was in the hospital in this tiny little town called Socorro.
00:39:00.650 --> 00:39:18.025
I can't even imagine what was going through your mind and the amount of time that had to go by the four-hour trip to Miami, then the five-hour flight to Bogota, then another couple hours then, another flight, then four hours.
00:39:19.751 --> 00:39:22.300
I can't even imagine what was going on.
00:39:22.300 --> 00:39:24.039
Just that, those, oh my, I can't even imagine.
00:39:24.039 --> 00:39:25.005
I can't even imagine.
00:39:25.005 --> 00:39:25.789
I can't even imagine.
00:39:25.789 --> 00:39:27.132
I don't even know if I want you to explain it to me.
00:39:27.132 --> 00:39:34.954
Uh, but I do want to ask skylar, uh, if you don't mind, if please feel free to say no, but do you?
00:39:34.954 --> 00:39:37.278
What do you remember?
00:39:38.059 --> 00:39:40.043
nothing about the day.
00:39:40.043 --> 00:39:48.063
I don't remember anything, but do you want us to tell you the story of what happened?
00:39:49.353 --> 00:39:50.530
Oh, of what actually happened.
00:39:50.530 --> 00:39:55.181
I mean, I think you did a good job, but I would be interested is what is the first thing you remember?
00:39:55.710 --> 00:40:31.422
I'm sure it's a waking up type of thing, but yes, I was in a medically induced coma for a while, so the first thing I remember actually is squeezing my mom's hand, one for yes, two for no, because my mouth was wired shut and even after that I couldn't talk for a while, so I just did one for yes and two for no yeah.
00:40:31.983 --> 00:40:44.240
So this older had cracked open her skull, crushed, her lungs fractured, her spine fractured both scapula, snapped her right thigh and pulverized her left ankle.
00:40:44.240 --> 00:41:01.932
So medical precedent indicated that basically there were four of her injuries that were virtually assured to be fatal, and clearly they were not.
00:41:01.932 --> 00:41:30.996
But actually what was interesting, brad, for me is that that flight became incredibly profound for me, because what I realized first of all is that resilience the time to find your resilience, to build your resilience, is not after the boulder falls.
00:41:30.996 --> 00:42:00.907
So what I realized is that this, as I, as the dust, kind of settled the perfect storm of negative emotions, I realized that for me, the most unacceptable emotion that I was feeling, out of all of them, was feeling powerless to help Skylar, and so that was when I was not willing to not be there for my child.
00:42:00.907 --> 00:42:08.085
And so I looked back and I realized that this was not the first boulder in my life.
00:42:08.085 --> 00:42:11.902
I mean, my goodness, I had been again.
00:42:12.063 --> 00:42:14.228
I had all kinds of disappointments in my life.
00:42:14.228 --> 00:42:16.083
I'd had all these quote unquote failures.
00:42:16.083 --> 00:42:22.505
I'd had two abusive relationships the ramifications for those had been immense.
00:42:22.505 --> 00:42:24.521
I'd had financial terror.
00:42:24.521 --> 00:42:25.704
I'd had things that happened.
00:42:25.704 --> 00:42:38.657
I was accustomed to my fair share of boulders and again, as a result of that, they had pushed me in the direction of studying the inner game.
00:42:38.657 --> 00:43:03.139
And so I realized that I may not be able to control the outer game no one could but I sure as heck could play a mean inner game and so I realized that if that was all I had to bring to my daughter, then game on, and this stuff was either real or it wasn't.
00:43:03.300 --> 00:43:19.436
And had I not had those hours, had that accident been like a car accident in Tampa, I probably would have rushed down to Tampa General or something and still been in that panicky frenzy.
00:43:20.077 --> 00:43:37.583
But because I had to get up at 30,000 feet and I had time to ask myself these powerful questions, it really I did not arrive at that little hospital as the second victim of this boulder.
00:43:37.583 --> 00:44:03.025
I was truly already at that point of force to be reckoned with and I was ready to lead Team Skylar, which meant that this global family that her friend had now alerted and that I had alerted that Skylar had this accident, now this global family was all believing oh my gosh, skylar is going to die any moment, any moment.
00:44:03.025 --> 00:44:36.030
That was not going to help her survive beyond this, so I had to shift it, which is what the posts on Facebook ended up being why they're in a book right now because people it started sharing them and passing them along, and so that began to really shift everything for us, and by the time we were able to fly her to Miami, some impossibilities had already taken place.
00:44:36.534 --> 00:44:38.842
That answers your Miami question.
00:44:39.123 --> 00:44:39.364
Yeah.
00:44:39.364 --> 00:45:10.034
So then we flew her to Miami, to Jackson Memorial, which is where the majority of the procedures took place, and the doctors there are really considered the Olympians of kind of neurosurgery and trauma, and so even they were so surprised to see what happened that they ended up calling us the Miracle.
00:45:10.153 --> 00:45:10.514
Family.
00:45:10.514 --> 00:45:17.742
I said that I've been on the Friday and I was enlisted to Miami on Monday.
00:45:18.543 --> 00:45:21.768
Wow, yeah, yeah, it was amazing.
00:45:22.668 --> 00:45:29.838
Yes, yeah, they have a fly and stay low because of the pressure.
00:45:29.838 --> 00:45:31.320
But yes.
00:45:32.121 --> 00:45:44.690
So initially they had thought so here's the thing about Columbia Most hospitals do not have an ICU, they are all privately owned.
00:45:44.690 --> 00:45:48.954
So fortunately Skylar was in one with an ICU.
00:45:48.954 --> 00:45:59.606
So originally they thought that maybe they would fly her because the facility would be better in Bogota, but there was the elevation that would add to the pressure on her brain.
00:45:59.606 --> 00:46:04.637
So the miracle started almost immediately.
00:46:04.637 --> 00:46:18.028
The little ICU happened to be located in a town where the former professor of neurosurgery from University of Bogota had retired because there were so many motorcycle accidents there.
00:46:18.028 --> 00:46:19.219
So he was there to help.
00:46:19.954 --> 00:46:31.480
But then they actually ignored some recommendations that they had gotten because, again, columbia isn't doesn't answer to the hipaa qualification.
00:46:31.480 --> 00:46:46.286
So they reached out to this big neurosurgery conference that was going on and was circulating all the x-rays and cat scans of schuyler and some of the highly esteemed neurosurgeons in the us.
00:46:46.286 --> 00:46:54.648
No, you need to take radical action and basically chop off a part of her brain to prevent the swelling which would have been irreversible.
00:46:54.648 --> 00:47:06.666
They chose not to do that and within 48 hours the swelling had reduced to what you might expect in two or three weeks.
00:47:06.666 --> 00:47:32.204
So we were able at that point, rather than to consider flying her to Bogota to find an airplane, an air ambulance that would airlift her to Miami, which is what we ended up doing, and she went through many procedures there, I told you that I'm not playing.
00:47:34.456 --> 00:47:36.240
Yes, she did, yes, she did.
00:47:36.240 --> 00:47:37.344
It was terrifying.
00:47:37.344 --> 00:47:38.847
It was terrifying.
00:47:40.717 --> 00:48:00.701
And you had great air paramedics, oh yeah, to bring you back and get you over to Miami as safely as they did.
00:48:01.041 --> 00:48:26.010
Oh yeah, so part of the crazy issue was that, first of all, in the ambulance that drove the four hours from Socorro back to Bucuramanga which is where the ambulance could her head would be banging against the top.
00:48:26.010 --> 00:48:33.313
They had limited amount of oxygen and no doctor in the ambulance with us.
00:48:33.313 --> 00:48:39.039
So what they hadn't been told was that she had that fracture in her spine.
00:48:39.039 --> 00:49:04.909
So meanwhile she's getting banged up against the top of the hospital, I mean of the ambulance, and so what is remarkable, another miracle was that with the broken bones it didn't nick her spinal cord and paralyze her, which, when we got her to Miami, they one technician slightly bumped into her bed, which was one of those rocking beds.
00:49:05.195 --> 00:49:05.556
Wilson.
00:49:05.597 --> 00:49:13.105
Bedway, yes, before she had the procedure to repair it, and one of the nurses just about bit his head off.
00:49:13.105 --> 00:49:17.481
That's how fragile it was, and yet it endured that.
00:49:17.481 --> 00:49:28.445
But when we got to Bukmaranga, just out of protocol, first of all, the Colombian team did not speak English.
00:49:28.445 --> 00:49:39.025
The American team had one person who could speak English, but they had to completely disconnect on the tarmac.
00:49:39.025 --> 00:50:02.998
So it took 45 minutes in the heat, with a limited amount of oxygen, to disconnect all of the Columbian equipment except for that which was physically embedded in her, and reconnect with American equipment and then get her back up this tiny little thing.
00:50:02.998 --> 00:50:05.804
So it was, it was formidable.
00:50:05.804 --> 00:50:06.965
It was formidable.
00:50:06.965 --> 00:50:12.923
So absolutely yes, the air ambulance team was unbelievable.
00:50:13.545 --> 00:50:17.356
Really, what's going through your mind through this ambulance ride?
00:50:17.356 --> 00:50:19.221
What is what's going on with you?
00:50:19.221 --> 00:50:24.239
I know it's, I know, I mean obviously mama bear is there, right, but what's going through your head?
00:50:25.342 --> 00:50:28.327
So I mean, so we are in.
00:50:28.327 --> 00:50:41.414
So one of the angels ended up being a woman who became like my sister, who actually lives here in Tarpon Springs, and so she was from Columbia, she and her husband.
00:50:41.414 --> 00:50:43.980
So she became almost like the interpreter.
00:50:43.980 --> 00:50:46.704
So we are on the phone with her.
00:50:46.704 --> 00:50:48.969
Who's on the phone?
00:50:48.969 --> 00:51:08.815
With the owner of the ambulance trying to tell the ambulance driver to slow down, stop, because they would speed and brake and speed and brake, and also there's zero visibility as you go around these corners, these switchbacks you just really can't see.
00:51:08.815 --> 00:51:12.561
So it was really nerve wracking.
00:51:12.561 --> 00:51:28.507
I was doing my best to stay in that really centered and aligned place which, looking back, it was remarkable how I was able to do that.
00:51:28.507 --> 00:51:31.150
It was totally it speaks to.
00:51:32.034 --> 00:52:02.547
Sometimes we have, I think we have a tendency to not always maybe I don't know whether it's believing that epic part of us exists when we're well, let me put it this way Sometimes I think we accomplish things that are epic not because we believe it's possible, but because someone that we love or someone that we know is invested in the outcome or thinks that we can and we don't want to let them down.
00:52:03.175 --> 00:52:10.548
And so that became my personal call to action was this is my daughter's life.
00:52:10.548 --> 00:52:26.822
Literally, if this works, which supposedly going back thousands of years, these laws of the inner game are valid, and if they are, then I am going to play them like I have never played them before.
00:52:26.822 --> 00:53:03.989
And so I really got into this zone of a knowing, and I absolutely became the sovereign of my own mind and would not allow my mind to go to entertain the possibility that this was going to be anything other than fine, whatever the new fine was destined to look like, and so that is what, I think, really kept me in a place that ended up energizing those around me.
00:53:03.989 --> 00:53:05.690
Even it became infectious.
00:53:07.338 --> 00:53:08.043
That's amazing.
00:53:08.043 --> 00:53:14.684
So basically, what you're saying is that sometimes you become epic or doing some.
00:53:14.684 --> 00:53:22.244
Let's just say what it is doing some epic shit, not out of necessity, because somebody's counting on you.
00:53:22.244 --> 00:53:24.829
We can far recede, and then we actually.
00:53:24.829 --> 00:53:32.760
It's really interesting because I talked to my kids today, talked to my kids today my when I say my kids, it's the Tampa Catholic track and field team about the edge.
00:53:32.760 --> 00:53:40.047
You find that edge and we all think that there's an edge there of what we can do, what we're capable of and everything else.
00:53:40.047 --> 00:53:46.492
And then out of necessity, you exceed it far beyond what you ever believed is possible.
00:53:46.492 --> 00:53:50.518
You exceed it far beyond what you ever believed is possible.
00:53:50.518 --> 00:53:55.873
And it sounds like you were able to go into a headspace where you said I have no choice but do some epic shit for my daughter.
00:53:55.873 --> 00:54:04.378
Excuse my language, but I mean talk about that is just over and above what maybe you thought was possible.
00:54:05.059 --> 00:54:28.849
Absolutely, absolutely, absolutely, and kind of to your point, I even went back to some of the energy training that I had in my 20s that my kids had never seen because I was so busy being super mom, single mom, that kind of thing I mean just no, it was not in the vocabulary.
00:54:28.849 --> 00:54:32.744
Plus, my son is like this budding accountant he was not.
00:54:32.744 --> 00:54:35.818
That kind of stuff would be like very woo-woo to him.
00:54:35.818 --> 00:54:52.943
Well, with Skylar, I was like I don't care if anyone thinks that I'm absolutely crazy, and I was convinced when I started creating the posts that were very inner game, that people would think oh, my gosh, poor Skylar.
00:54:52.943 --> 00:54:58.438
She has this delirious mom who is so freaking out of touch.
00:54:58.438 --> 00:55:12.719
I was terrified, but I was like I don't care if people think I'm crazy, I don't care if people think I'm crazy.
00:55:12.719 --> 00:55:14.902
This is how I believe I need to play this game to win.
00:55:14.922 --> 00:55:24.500
So what became really interesting for my kids is that one of the times I used a pendulum crystal and so this was in Miami and Skye's in a coma, coma.
00:55:24.500 --> 00:55:28.286
Her eyes are completely taped shut.
00:55:28.286 --> 00:55:41.135
She there's no way that she knows what's going on, unless you're, maybe, unless I was like holding her hand and asking her very specific questions loudly to squeeze.
00:55:41.135 --> 00:55:42.217
I was not.
00:55:42.217 --> 00:55:51.322
She was lying there and I closed my eyes and I focused my energy onto her as I just allowed.
00:55:51.322 --> 00:56:11.318
The crystal would go over a place of a part of her body that was injured.
00:56:11.318 --> 00:56:28.467
It would start spinning and really then, kind of like hone, it would start moving and that part of her body, without me touching it, would start moving, and so it was a really profound experience for her.
00:56:28.467 --> 00:57:03.597
We had so many like experiences that are not able to be explained, brad, it was like uncanny, and it got to the point where forest times, the doctors would pull me into the nurse's station and point at something like on the cat scan and say I know you don't know what you're looking at, but I just have to show you this, because what you are looking at is the CAT scan of someone who either does not make it or who is vegetative, and clearly your daughter in there is neither one of those.
00:57:03.597 --> 00:57:13.786
This is what you were seeing is a medical impossibility here, and if it was any other family, we would believe that there was some sort of error with the machine.
00:57:14.429 --> 00:57:41.432
Yeah, so it was amazing to be a part of, and what was even more amazing was that I got to the point where I held that alignment so intensely that it began radiating out and it became almost like embracing the entire ICU while we were there.
00:57:41.655 --> 00:57:49.175
It was fascinating and the nurses were talking about it, the other patients' families were talking about it, the other patients' families were talking about it.
00:57:49.175 --> 00:58:19.878
It was really interesting and just reinforced to me what the potential we have as human beings when we really and that's why I do what I do today, why I'm so passionate, because I've seen the potential I consider myself more than a transformational coach, a potential amplifier to help people identify, then clean up what's in the way and then realize how to unleash it, how to direct it.
00:58:19.878 --> 00:58:30.471
Because were we all to really learn, we all to really learn, which we're never trained to do, how to become the sovereign of our own mind?
00:58:30.471 --> 00:59:00.376
The potential I mean, we saw with just kind of I was focused on doing that, but imagine if you had an entire community doing this and a much less an entire planet where we were doing this and yeah, so you know what it's so interesting that you said and it sparked something in me when I was when you were saying this it's so interesting.
00:59:00.918 --> 00:59:11.605
so I've spent a lot of time in the healthcare field as well and because of that and military and everything else, I've been to a lot of funerals, unfortunately.
00:59:11.605 --> 00:59:26.246
But I will say there's been a lot of times where it's like the viewing and you go in, you see it, but basically everybody's in a church or a synagogue or in a room and all they're doing is sitting there.
00:59:26.246 --> 00:59:27.422
They've gone, they paid their respects, they've come back and they've just sat and all they're doing is sitting there.
00:59:27.422 --> 00:59:29.068
They've gone, they paid their respects, they've come back and they've just sat.
00:59:29.068 --> 00:59:43.527
Sometimes they're reading a bible, something interesting that, but most of the time they're just sitting there and the energy that's radiating and I've always thought about it and I never could put a, could put words to it until you just did.
00:59:44.297 --> 00:59:49.262
But I remember being and especially it was a child who had cancer and unfortunately succumbed.
00:59:49.262 --> 00:59:56.043
But the parents were there and went through the receiving line, gave, paid my respects and then everybody just sat down in the church.
00:59:56.043 --> 00:59:57.045
That was it.
00:59:57.045 --> 01:00:00.661
But the amount of energy that was going in the.
01:00:00.661 --> 01:00:04.117
I remember talking to the parents later and she's saying that she could feel it.
01:00:04.117 --> 01:00:31.476
She could feel this love and when she had thought, maybe that it was her son, I think it was more about people giving them their essence to help her heal going forward, and I think that's I know what you're explaining fascinating.
01:00:31.496 --> 01:00:33.157
For example, there were two moments that were really memorable for me.
01:00:33.157 --> 01:00:53.204
One was this I think Haitian or Jamaican family that came in and clearly it was their father, who had been in a motorcycle accident, and when the shifts of the nurses changed, everybody had to leave the patient's room and allow the nurses to do what they needed to do.
01:00:53.204 --> 01:00:56.461
So we were in this teeny tiny little waiting room.
01:00:56.461 --> 01:01:56.574
If you wanted to stay on that same floor and I didn't usually, but for whatever reason, that particular evening I did and I went in there and the only other people was this family and they were wailing and there was a 16 year old girl that kind of isolated herself from the rest of the family and she was sitting very close to me and I could feel her distress, very close to me, and I could feel her distress, and so I asked her if I could hug her and hold her and she said yes and she just kind of started weeping in my arms and I said something along the lines of I am here with you as testimonials that miracles do happen.
01:01:56.735 --> 01:02:02.588
My daughter is in there and she has survived the unsurvivable.
01:02:02.588 --> 01:02:09.949
You need to be the beacon of hope for your family.
01:02:09.949 --> 01:02:11.110
You go in there.
01:02:11.110 --> 01:02:18.385
You see, beyond whatever has happened to your father, miracles are happening every single day.
01:02:18.385 --> 01:02:20.048
You be that beacon.
01:02:20.048 --> 01:02:25.023
You go in there and I could see it was weird.
01:02:25.083 --> 01:03:15.123
I could see the grief kind of roll off of her and be replaced with resolve and again, with her family, she became the beacon and they came up to me on other days when we would see each other and really say thank you so much and their father also had this miraculous sort of recovery and it really was amazing to experience how infectious that could be and how capable we are of making that shift when we give our mind very clear guidance of where we want it to go and who we want to show up being.
01:03:15.123 --> 01:03:34.143
I have another saying that we cannot miss the boat because we are the boat but we do have to learn how to captain it, and how well we learn to captain it really determines the kind of experience we have as we're crossing the ocean.
01:03:35.726 --> 01:03:44.764
That's powerful stuff, and I imagine that was starting to be the seeds that were getting planted for what you ended up doing with Grit Mindset Academy.
01:03:44.764 --> 01:03:47.730
So how long was Skylar in Miami?
01:04:10.755 --> 01:04:17.202
We stayed for one more month and waited until the beginning of July to come back to Tampa so that she could still be in the same environment.
01:04:17.222 --> 01:04:23.391
I trusted that team implicitly to begin her rehab therapy because she had really gone down to about 92 pounds at the time.
01:04:23.391 --> 01:04:31.027
So she was a rail, a rail and again she could barely swallow.
01:04:31.027 --> 01:04:36.483
She had a brace around because of the spinal cord injury.
01:04:36.483 --> 01:04:38.686
She could barely talk.
01:04:38.686 --> 01:04:40.496
She could not raise her arms.
01:04:40.496 --> 01:04:44.061
She could, like I said, she could not sit unattended.
01:04:44.061 --> 01:04:47.628
She definitely couldn't stand or walk or anything like that.
01:04:47.628 --> 01:04:54.704
So, yeah, well, I mean it gets better and better.
01:04:54.704 --> 01:05:07.704
So so update on her physical progress so far is she has once again defied all odds and cannot walk solo.
01:05:07.704 --> 01:05:33.746
Yet, although cameo on that, with a walker that has kind of the arm pedestals, I can, yes, if someone is not following her, like right behind her, shadowing her, in case, because the the biggest damage really it's not that she has a spinal cord injury, it's the balance and the impact onto her head.
01:05:33.746 --> 01:05:50.112
So that's what she is still doing fearlessly tackling and just it keeps blowing through impossibilities and doing remarkable things.
01:05:50.472 --> 01:05:51.114
So all right.
01:05:51.114 --> 01:05:53.938
Well, today you're in a while.
01:05:53.938 --> 01:05:56.103
You're walking with our pads in the whole bit.
01:05:56.103 --> 01:06:02.115
Another year from now, you're going to be on that start line at Gasparilla and running it.
01:06:02.115 --> 01:06:05.157
So that's going to be amazing.
01:06:05.157 --> 01:06:07.019
Yeah, next time.
01:06:07.019 --> 01:06:13.905
Anytime you want to go back to Gasparilla, I'm pushing and screw the little 5K, let's do the 15.
01:06:16.557 --> 01:06:18.713
You know, yeah, that's my piece.
01:06:18.713 --> 01:06:22.284
Well, yeah, but if you ever want to, I'm pushing, I'm all over it, I'm sick.
01:06:22.766 --> 01:06:29.719
Well, yeah, but if you ever want to I'm pushing, I'm all over it I would be honored more than ever.
01:06:30.550 --> 01:06:31.777
We've got the Iron.
01:06:31.817 --> 01:06:32.179
Man.
01:06:32.731 --> 01:06:34.054
Yeah, I'd be all over it.
01:06:34.436 --> 01:06:35.278
Yeah.
01:06:35.318 --> 01:06:35.539
So.
01:06:35.539 --> 01:06:43.780
So, let's step back just one second and, as we come to a close here, meredith, what would you give?
01:06:43.780 --> 01:06:44.543
What, meredith?
01:06:44.543 --> 01:06:45.505
What would you give?
01:06:45.505 --> 01:06:54.188
What kind of advice would you give, maybe a step-by-step plan on somebody who's gone through something like this and they feel like it's the end of it, there's nothing they can do.
01:06:54.188 --> 01:07:00.222
They felt that powerlessness that you felt, and you were able to go above it, which that in itself was a miracle.
01:07:00.222 --> 01:07:05.135
Well, what would somebody that's in somewhat of the same situation and they're feeling that powerlessness?
01:07:05.135 --> 01:07:09.900
What would be some of the steps that you would take, that you would help them take, moving forward?
01:07:10.630 --> 01:07:10.831
Perfect?
01:07:10.831 --> 01:07:12.295
That's a great question.
01:07:12.295 --> 01:07:14.762
I'm going to have a prelude to that question, though.
01:07:14.762 --> 01:07:35.802
If you are listening to this podcast and you do not have a boulder dropping in your life and you do not have a boulder dropping in your life you do not have any big challenge right now, but you do have, potentially, some dreams that you would like to have be big dreams, or you're just a human being who is having a life experience right now.
01:07:36.610 --> 01:07:47.356
Now is the time to realize that, in my humble opinion, we have one goal, and one goal only, and that is to be taking our last breath.
01:07:47.356 --> 01:07:55.181
Whenever that is we have no idea, clearly Looking back saying, oh my God, that was freaking epic.
01:07:55.181 --> 01:08:03.902
I hope I have the chance to do this again, and the way we get there is by learning to play our inner game to win.
01:08:03.902 --> 01:08:08.581
It is not just in our tragedies when this becomes important.
01:08:08.581 --> 01:08:21.140
If we are to experience that sense of having fully lived, coming, waking up the day, feeling exuberant and fully alive, it begins in the inner game.
01:08:21.140 --> 01:08:23.358
If you want to believe that your skies have no limit, it begins in the inner game.
01:08:23.358 --> 01:08:25.423
If you want to believe that your skies have no limit, it begins in the inner game.
01:08:25.423 --> 01:08:48.051
Our minds crave guidance, and if we do not give our minds guidance, it will look for guidance elsewhere, and that's when it can shift onto autopilot and we start feeling like we are stuck or that we don't even know who we are stuck or that we don't even know who we are.
01:08:48.051 --> 01:08:54.671
So what I'm saying is, if you really want to feel like you have fully lived, it doesn't take a boulder to say now is the time to go into your inner game.
01:08:54.671 --> 01:09:09.761
So how does that begin for all of us, whether you're in the middle of an insurmountable obstacle right now, or whether you are just waking up saying, oh my gosh, I will never live this moment again.
01:09:09.761 --> 01:09:17.356
To me, this is what the 100 Days of Epic is based on these three elements.
01:09:17.356 --> 01:09:21.409
It really comes down to the mastery of three elements in your inner game.
01:09:21.409 --> 01:09:25.451
One is your focus, and so so I'll.
01:09:25.451 --> 01:09:31.743
So one is your focus, one is your language and one is your imagination.
01:09:31.743 --> 01:09:45.145
So focus means understanding not only where you are, but who you are, and because you are not the same as you were even yesterday.
01:09:45.145 --> 01:09:54.436
So it's really starting to come into touch with that, and there, of course, many of you who are listening to this may have heard that what you focus on, expand.
01:09:54.436 --> 01:09:55.840
That's fine.
01:09:56.440 --> 01:10:05.039
Except, most of us believe that we're focusing on what we want, when actually we're focusing on the presence, the lack of the presence, of what we want.
01:10:05.039 --> 01:10:06.782
So the exact opposite.
01:10:06.782 --> 01:10:21.854
So that is why, for most people, if, let's say, there are two of us in a coffee shop and you were to ask me where do I want to be a year from now, I would believe I was talking about what I want by saying, oh my gosh, brad, a year from now.
01:10:21.854 --> 01:10:22.538
Oh, I want to grow my business.
01:10:22.538 --> 01:10:24.189
I want by saying, oh my gosh, brad, a year from now, I want to grow my business.
01:10:24.189 --> 01:10:27.760
I want to be doing something that I'm passionate about.
01:10:27.760 --> 01:10:32.922
I want to be out of this scenario where I'm feeling such grief and such pressure.
01:10:33.711 --> 01:10:40.902
Most people would feel that they were talking about what they want and yet, if you notice the emotional frequency of that, it's very heavy.
01:10:40.902 --> 01:10:50.949
And the reason it's heavy is because we're focusing on the lack of the presence versus oh my gosh, a year from now, I intend to be freaking on fire.
01:10:50.949 --> 01:11:00.534
I'm going to wake up knowing my impact growing, loving the challenges that I encounter and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
01:11:00.534 --> 01:11:13.730
It's that focusing more on feeling and by really getting in touch with the feeling, your mind gets the programming and goes oh, I see the guidance, I see what you want.
01:11:13.730 --> 01:11:17.215
Okay, let's go get it right.
01:11:17.215 --> 01:11:18.195
So focus.
01:11:18.195 --> 01:11:18.837
Number one.
01:11:18.837 --> 01:11:21.019
Two your language.
01:11:21.179 --> 01:11:33.222
If you walk around all day long using the phrases that have the invisible stories that keep you small, you will stay small, and what does that look like?
01:11:33.222 --> 01:11:34.952
Oh God.
01:11:34.952 --> 01:11:38.717
The problem right now is that I always end up not being able to finish.
01:11:38.717 --> 01:11:39.399
I just, I, just.
01:11:39.399 --> 01:11:44.485
I always end up not being able to finish, or I just can't find the confidence.
01:11:44.485 --> 01:11:52.091
I mean, I'm done well in my life, but it's those phrases.
01:11:52.091 --> 01:12:05.244
And, if you notice, one of the most self-sabotaging practices that we have is to be unaware of our present tense statements.
01:12:05.244 --> 01:12:25.698
Our present tense statements always reflect what we believe to be truth, and so, therefore, when we walk around saying my biggest challenge is, we are creating programming code again for that subconscious, however, we do have to believe it.
01:12:25.698 --> 01:12:34.498
So I'm not advocating going into the mirror and say I am a money magnet, only to have your mind say have you checked your bank account recently?
01:12:34.498 --> 01:12:41.502
Right, it has to be believable, but don't assume that there's only one variation of truth.
01:12:41.502 --> 01:12:53.863
It's also true to say my biggest commitment right now is to find the confidence that is going to help me go on and really get beyond this bump in the road right now, etc.
01:12:53.863 --> 01:12:56.137
It's my biggest opportunity.
01:12:56.137 --> 01:12:59.761
I'm excited to overcome this right.
01:12:59.761 --> 01:13:04.242
It's those kind of phrases that start feeling things bubbling.
01:13:04.369 --> 01:13:07.136
And the third thing is your imagination.
01:13:07.136 --> 01:13:22.557
As adults, we tend to use it only to fear, to worry or to doubt, and that allows us to mistake, fear for danger Nine times out of 10, we are not in danger.
01:13:22.557 --> 01:13:26.012
We have not jumped out of a plane with no parachute.
01:13:26.012 --> 01:13:32.873
We are creating a story about something that has not happened yet, chances are will never happen.
01:13:32.873 --> 01:13:37.752
Were it to happen, probably won't end up quite as badly as we imagine.
01:13:38.112 --> 01:13:57.377
So, were we to get in the practice of envisioning the possibility and envisioning beyond the obstacle and do that for our teams, for our children, to be able to be the beacon beyond that, then really, the sky.
01:13:57.377 --> 01:14:05.916
That's where you get into the place where the sky has no limit and where the impossible shifts quite easily into the I am possible.
01:14:05.916 --> 01:14:47.466
So it all begins with the inner game and really paying attention to what you're focusing on and what you're making it mean, what kind of inner narrative you are making your reality, because that is how you will experience your reality and then, finally, how you're using this huge resource that we have our imagination, in other words, our ability to envision, because the imagination is what has the capability of getting us to that inner frequency that magnetically aligns with the things that bring us joy, bring us happiness.
01:14:47.466 --> 01:14:54.070
We have to be in emotional frequency, the same alignment, in order for that to show up in our life.
01:14:54.070 --> 01:14:55.033
Does that make sense?
01:14:55.793 --> 01:14:56.555
Absolutely.
01:14:56.555 --> 01:15:01.091
Oh my God, amazing stuff right there, everybody, so listen.
01:15:01.091 --> 01:15:03.372
So basically what Meredith is saying?
01:15:03.372 --> 01:15:23.895
That if you're in this position where you're stuck or you're trying to get over an obstacle and adversity, all you need to do is focus on flying F for focus, l is your language and your imagination, so you just need to fly, yes, and then the sky's the limit.
01:15:26.073 --> 01:15:28.060
The limit is sometimes just the beginning.
01:15:28.649 --> 01:15:32.095
Right, so, so, yeah, so definitely so.
01:15:32.095 --> 01:16:00.890
The Grit Mindset Academy gritmindsetacademycom I'm going to link that in the show notes for you and that's where you can have a 20 minute call with Meredith and you'll be able to get some of these answers and, if you're, find ways to get unstuck and then then have have a good conversation and, if you're lucky, you'll get to meet Skylar but only if you're lucky, like I was today and she's, as you can see and as you can hear, she's an incredible the.
01:16:00.890 --> 01:16:06.002
Both of them are incredible people and I would definitely take a look at Grit Mindset Academy.
01:16:06.002 --> 01:16:12.302
I'll also link to her books the Sky's the Limit and 100 Days of Epic.
01:16:12.302 --> 01:16:14.617
That'll be right there in the show notes for you.
01:16:14.689 --> 01:16:25.431
So pick those up, give those a little, give those a read, and I just want to say to both of you it has been such a pleasure and I hope we get to do this again.
01:16:25.431 --> 01:16:47.798
Next time we'll be able to dig a little bit deeper into mindset training and watch as Skylar continues to progress and, hopefully, if anyone wants to come out to the 2025 Gasparilla weekend at Distance Weekend and watch me and Skylar cross the finish line, you're more than welcome to.
01:16:47.798 --> 01:16:49.242
So, yeah, so definitely Thank you.
01:16:49.242 --> 01:16:52.274
Thank you, ladies, I really appreciate it.
01:16:52.916 --> 01:17:07.212
Thank you so much, rang, for having us, and if you are listening to this, make sure you subscribe to his podcast, because this is so cool and this kind of stuff just this is truly how you soar.
01:17:07.212 --> 01:17:14.595
So, brad, thank you for doing this podcast and specifically for having us on board here oh no, it's been my pleasure.
01:17:14.655 --> 01:17:15.197
Thank you so much.
01:17:15.197 --> 01:17:18.163
All right, everybody, listen until next time.
01:17:18.163 --> 01:17:22.360
Remember to spark desire and incinerate your limits.